#BunkerBoy’s #babygate Is First Step Toward’s Trump’s Next Acquisition

(PenrosePapers.com) The 1.7 miles of black fencing that now makes up the official White House security zone was assumed to have been erected to deal with the peaceful demonstrations that have been raging in Washington over the past two weeks. In a PenrosePapers.com exclusive, we can now confirm that this fencing is actually the new border for the pending Trump Federal Greens Golf Course.

“It’s been in the planning stages for a while now. The protests have just given the administration the justification they needed to move forward,” says Amanda White, PenrosePapers.com Chief Sports Editor. “Trump Federal Greens is a done deal. All that remains is the question: how large will it be?”

Trump Federal Greens is expected to take up the entire 80 acres that make up the area known as The Ellipse. Independent course designers have admitted to PenrosePapers.com that this should be enough to squeeze in a seven-hole course.

It is assumed that President Trump will not accept this.

“He’ll never go for seven holes,” Amanda says. “It’s like golfing with one ball. Not the biggest, bestest enough. So they’re going to need more space. As in, raze the adjacent National Museum of African American History and Culture and relocate the Washington Monument, space. Boom, there’s your nine holes.”

Lafayette Square

But what of Lafayette Square, another area recently fenced into the enlarged security zone?

“Lafayette is certainly large enough for holes eight and nine, but administration officials are going ahead with ground breaking there next week for the planned Trump Monument. Or maybe two weeks,” Amanda says. “We are hearing rumors that they are having problems locating the estimated four billion gallons of gold paint that the monument will require.”

Meanwhile, work on the Trump Federal Greens Golf Course is also on hold pending the protester burning of the National Museum of African American History and Culture. This is tentatively scheduled for next Thursday, according to our source in the Attorney General’s office.

If work on the golf course can start by the end of the month, the speculation is that President Trump can be gassing protesters, walking to the course, and defiantly photo-opping with a raised 5-iron by mid-September.

 

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1 Response

  1. Overlookguest355 says:

    This will be worth it just to see the bag that Ivanka will have to bring to fit the golf club into.

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